Mourning our loss and dealing with daily life

Im still hurting so much. Im crmaping off and on today but yesterday it hit me hard. DF and I had errands to run and while we were out I started gushing blood and cramping. It figures that would happen when I finally leave the house. What's wrose is, I was at the seamstress, trying ot get my daughters pageant dress taken out a size. Im standing there pouring blood and didnt want to say anything. I got out of there as fast as I could and had DF get me super absorbant pads.

Im bleeding so much today as well. The cramping is mild, but the bleeding isn't. I can't wait for this to be over with. It's physically and emotionally draining. I am doing my best to cope with our loss while also dealing with my daily life. My two previous kids need me. Im trying to be strong for them. They know what's going on and are sad, but seem to be dealing with it ok.

Yesterday while I was out, I got new makeup for my daughter to wear for her pageant. It took forever to find colors that I like for her. I didn't want anything to dark, but it couldnt be to light either. When we got home (after a long day) I applied some it to see how it looks. I took a few pics to see how it photographs as well. I didn't apply the eyelashes for the pics but I did try them on her. They look very natural but I need to cut the inside corner down just a tad.

Here's a pic I took of her last night.